% m+ y+ Z8 p5 W% S- p3 x例如: 1 C6 n( U" R/ e/ Q& [% ~2 X6 L- `" O4 D; ]* h5 Z& B
Many people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白) 7 r; }# ?* F1 }" r& h1 u$ U! R ' i7 q) m) f' w/ d# fThree hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。)4 o6 F4 F" C+ n3 d2 k7 m$ E4 k
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This news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread)8 G, d: a: R7 k6 ?3 w6 L
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The president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?) 3 G5 I" u# U1 {9 f" s( ^: D2 ?5 G# S0 S$ W6 `
I have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。) & p/ y5 L% |/ u8 n7 w C+ ?. s5 T* U8 l
Mr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor) - H1 J: q- k2 _) i9 d . h, Q8 U* J2 L) P7 bWe hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!) 1 i1 E# g9 V$ I0 ]( P" K7 B+ p) Z0 K' Y
The charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词) 8 |3 v% g6 B4 h0 P. r$ ]6 T" o 3 o; ^- r, k! A" F& V0 V9 \5 RWe don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。)' J) R8 R p6 s; L3 o {/ l
3 D. f) A' ]7 M: `# \( VPlease act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?) , w1 F( F4 L! G/ G5 q$ o; v ! V- l$ E. y/ A1 Y- {3 `这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白! 6 O8 M) [& N4 D, ~4 _" k/ p4 o$ j1 J7 y0 d$ A, y" }$ S" E
/ U" ~/ H& s- h6 v2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。 D9 s9 P& P" v2 \2 \0 O " _4 s! V6 l& A; A# v4 X5 @例如:' F( o. H* t' |" h1 }
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At this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now)0 ]) L8 V8 ` i0 O% J
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Despite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though) 7 d6 F* {5 G0 T7 y: t( L, M+ |" e4 I" n/ {3 ^$ x
I am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think) 5 o' B7 S' h6 t1 @& F2 v& C1 U) R V$ R; A: J$ w
He quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because)/ D! f' K* z1 C5 ?" T5 X& G, x
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In the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually) : z" }0 Y; M' M! ~5 t4 l- w& F! Z6 P; b) @% _* S5 m
She shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer)0 r; X# I' |9 J% G& C7 o
]2 S+ a0 t$ A7 P+ B; v0 I# lI will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生)! [5 ^+ B: \3 [/ y. G
( `# J6 s. d$ y$ _) P! O如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如:- j9 W1 R* l- {
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The consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。) , j# I8 V. `# S* ^% h, h& Y6 ?% F0 C: d6 N& x) J- B5 i1 {6 i
The letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.)+ _& n8 m: X# H; D( ^7 ^
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He has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。) : l6 r$ X# d/ l5 E2 H8 n4 Q1 R. R7 x9 d
He has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味)" a9 K# u# X- E2 l0 s
! h# W% d6 N. k3 P1 _' L7 OWe assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的)6 c. E `! X9 Z3 z
! v! b T" g+ o7 E8 T0 T. \' A! ?Enclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收) Q& V7 k) I# j7 @# v: ]# R0 t1 i
$ f5 y V7 Z, w4 R8 H写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.) % U3 B, K9 H" R- z& p 8 c) {0 f& @; \) Q, Z& V此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。2 K9 ^! T/ U; g A, V( _1 w
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7 e* _# F" q( Z+ q( e# I% R1 k$ g' V& F 3.老外为了族群和谐相处,除不用歧视或偏见的字眼外,连男女性别,也要避免区别,以示「平等」。 2 J" X( G% H0 d8 h# l4 _4 G1 ?' _3 U# R0 {7 @6 O& e+ I. l
例如: / a- D& s0 r9 A& h& w1 s+ J( _$ _$ ^, \7 {$ W
Mankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数)* ?4 R) ^9 D2 Y
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Manpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources)0 ^- C3 o5 u1 V2 i
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This small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了) ! }6 u: L8 {; B) a 2 W9 t0 r+ G0 P* c: p, oHe (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。) a; l, q6 M- P+ Y8 ]0 u
0 n1 D' p4 F% G1 T* T' s2 i3 aMany businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。): I: S; }6 E2 x9 q$ ~
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Policemen (policewomen) should treat citizens with courtesy.(警察对人民应该有礼貌)(假如把 policemen 或 policewomen 改为 police officers 就可避免男女性别) 1 J: |) k6 `- u! B; B' ] . K; T% T+ _$ `8 ?4 L$ i- g: u4 HCongressmen (congresswomen) should speak up for their constitutes. (国会议员应该为其选民说话)(constitute = voter) (我们也可以把 congressmen 或 congresswomen 改为 members of congress 或 congressional representatives) 3 {) v. A/ c) s) R: R5 v/ } / q1 _$ e Y5 J! f/ x$ G. CStewardesses for international regions may get jet lag sometimes.(国际航线的空中小姐有时会有时差疲惫的现象)(如把 stewardess 改为 flight attendant,就能包括男女空中服务员。)4 x4 M! f# o, }! D