8 [5 x, B/ }2 l" tMany people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白)' M! B0 K1 l1 N
+ b) ~+ K) \2 mThree hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。)4 M6 Z+ k( V! L% g! r; P p) V. K
- Z$ ]; F* c/ s: [This news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread) D+ k5 l) k; j- |, X B9 m % g$ ^: O$ p$ E. m9 y) H2 |The president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?) % y+ \- W5 k% x$ R6 n5 i1 L 2 A; O* f: c4 L' K6 e; yI have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。) $ g9 I: a8 N/ a9 Z' i8 h2 z9 I- v! h2 i$ L9 S: a. N1 v
Mr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor)" b8 n+ y0 [9 h
5 N6 \! U' X. V* q* ~We hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!) + [- I+ J! y9 F3 j0 {/ N 4 a6 q* E2 R5 S$ }' e8 `& B/ @The charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词)8 J+ U4 C0 d% U P; \
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We don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。)" \# a. }/ {- G) |4 r
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Please act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?)/ k7 ]+ ], X: M: W) [9 a+ K
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这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白! % J9 T) t( V4 m1 I! q& p6 b. N4 l6 A/ E+ `* N
( n: i" f. x' M/ ]8 v+ b 2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。* b. Y/ X& C: `
+ S- l& Y q, O0 A, N5 _7 {3 i例如: . I; u& E) Q( y6 e6 x) J 3 H" I& T: P! n: {At this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now)$ @0 `6 q" }) j' ]4 i! N; s
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Despite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though) ; r7 W. s1 D. t& H, t8 z7 U3 ~9 ]9 Q7 U- |+ G: \6 L2 Y9 P
I am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think)4 x4 F) n* @- w5 Y2 X
( v' `- r5 q6 |: o/ k# d0 Q9 DHe quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because)! h! k2 |4 l9 c9 `
' u# @. r5 t- N+ x& vIn the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually)" M# K" V4 f v) G) b" x+ Q
( c$ F: d- D, P! B/ tShe shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer)# I3 ^$ R% ]; t' O L
4 _5 ?: C' n2 V& L% ?. {* Z) g, LI will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生) , e, X/ t' e$ o5 Y1 q; Z( G ! L, k1 }6 Y6 T$ d8 {如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如:+ D) w, V1 ~. K1 i
' b, ~6 K0 @& P% ]1 E7 @' DThe consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。); d/ `# a) g8 J/ Z- R1 P& ]* |+ @2 h6 |
5 z+ a3 O3 D' W0 I* oThe letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.) ! v' F) z# a4 V& j( b" @: s; y5 Q1 P# z- C% h; v3 S+ Y
He has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。) - X7 x* W0 B4 A, [ V % }4 k* l$ |8 _+ T( K; C# x0 aHe has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味)4 Q+ k6 k5 o) c( `, I$ d7 d
( J) s! `* f/ {( J' n5 B4 O/ dWe assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的)( c" w* `1 E" r& M& C* a! c
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Enclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收). ?! s5 B) e" ~& U
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写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.)2 H) `7 ]7 Y+ ]0 ?
. y0 W; H" A! `+ X I: @. A此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。. g: p0 H+ V4 y1 D7 A- C, n8 x
' F5 o, f3 n' K* S- K1 h6 N $ K% S( k* h1 b7 I7 [& d; ~3.老外为了族群和谐相处,除不用歧视或偏见的字眼外,连男女性别,也要避免区别,以示「平等」。- b2 y( f, x& m# ^* o
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例如:; X0 b1 c: p* C* ^
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Mankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数) ( l. Y# L( q" j5 k1 f8 a$ e) C- a) N y9 K5 x+ o
Manpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources) 7 }- k7 ?/ ^9 r5 d! K & P6 X! u. p( F# _/ U) S7 OThis small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了) $ @8 n- j1 ~ h4 D9 `# A) C* C! n' E( K: i
He (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。) 1 z+ m+ s/ C- v- G 3 ]7 a: F; ]: {- B% C4 {" \. WMany businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。) $ z. }! R0 E) ^* e: K$ C p4 f! K4 Z9 a7 M" ~
Policemen (policewomen) should treat citizens with courtesy.(警察对人民应该有礼貌)(假如把 policemen 或 policewomen 改为 police officers 就可避免男女性别) * C% V+ p+ ]5 c! m& ?& r0 Q" x2 Y0 j2 ^
Congressmen (congresswomen) should speak up for their constitutes. (国会议员应该为其选民说话)(constitute = voter) (我们也可以把 congressmen 或 congresswomen 改为 members of congress 或 congressional representatives)& h0 f' L$ z: a9 _8 a
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Stewardesses for international regions may get jet lag sometimes.(国际航线的空中小姐有时会有时差疲惫的现象)(如把 stewardess 改为 flight attendant,就能包括男女空中服务员。)* y0 N2 S& X6 ^3 J: x+ s: @