; w4 v u) _2 A; X( Z3 }Many people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白) : a/ g+ `; k/ Q6 D / O& \- E/ L6 s* F" GThree hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。) + `; n! U8 n; n. J1 K) S' q `% k/ z; g+ V7 ~
This news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread) ( V) @ c$ O2 m: L/ v. w$ I* O( F* n! }0 k2 v
The president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?) , f' ^" i' Y8 f! V4 Z1 t! Q; i) F o2 _, G5 e- e8 iI have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。)7 I$ R. o( @% w
- {& ~! u& e8 i7 ?* ~0 s& ^Mr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor)( }9 p- ^ Q3 ?
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We hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!) |; `4 z$ V f" e0 ~' d. r& E) |# p* W9 _9 t: b4 f
The charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词) 9 Y C# O+ i, {- t) o0 @+ O/ |/ u" i+ o! d0 g
We don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。) " @. I9 j; N1 q6 Z2 G7 H5 n+ \4 |1 I" {/ c
Please act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?)1 b+ T7 C- w8 V( ^! d. e% w3 {) P
5 w6 R$ ?( u* {% q4 r) X& M这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白! % B) @# g* u% j# w M; T# _ & n2 i" T- ^# V4 y0 G# n. j& ]) k6 s- ~0 `! p 2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。$ k8 ^% d8 E) ]0 @( G& I
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例如: % H# d$ g/ w9 B6 F+ l6 V6 z( B9 a9 L, ]0 Q V- T3 F' r) _/ F
At this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now) # f: @7 q2 [6 ~( c( e8 B + l& @1 a6 _, M/ ?. ?Despite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though) 5 d' H8 j2 k, M" l0 R% B0 Z. f2 r- l2 r: j6 ~- E* \
I am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think) ! ?8 w" O8 X- Q4 j" g- a& _7 B( h z: j! _- D7 S. d% d' i# E
He quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because) ! [7 F# b( g3 ~/ _9 q) D# b5 [ & }( X7 J3 A5 d; L8 N7 s2 TIn the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually). |. b- }6 N' i9 l' B' K
5 F% X$ J) C& g3 aShe shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer) - }4 P0 Z& L- L1 g7 ?/ X s S; {, H. a) l1 V6 ?0 YI will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生) ( z; y7 }: k# G2 J3 J 2 M" d4 [ {' |$ O2 P如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如:' n U" y9 K) y% Q! c5 c" P8 F
5 g/ B" s. M) W/ lThe consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。); L: N: c& T6 e
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The letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.) " z' v3 w; D- o% g5 ^4 W: S4 w% t. M0 V) e
He has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。) , |5 u. a& g& _2 a' \ 3 S5 s8 J! q; h$ GHe has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味)/ @* J9 E1 g0 A2 K) }1 v
4 v3 V- a6 g! F: R& pWe assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的) % x1 `6 z$ v, a* K 2 [% U. Q4 a' z5 JEnclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收) ! [# f9 q4 w0 y2 [; S9 D# j/ H 7 Q1 B) ?. U$ o写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.) * f, l0 G! A6 ]+ D ' w/ P W9 ^- ~. n# U$ {1 `此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。5 M# C* v" l8 s( ~+ L' O
+ S' u# I* Y( E例如: ' j7 i7 i% q+ b1 N3 X. N0 l! E$ B6 ^$ y% z1 k$ c/ V
Mankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数) 0 [7 U7 \% d3 j: }4 \( ]: l4 s0 \* s. R$ l
Manpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources)$ N$ J" K6 E) D& {
F3 u' ]% M- T1 J# GThis small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了) 3 f( U* J- t8 ]6 L / @! q5 T- [! j# M. I& PHe (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。)2 g* n% U* j$ x% `* [# ]
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Many businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。)$ S& Q: c2 m, ]" _( j& U$ H' k
, g9 Z' a' T/ Y& yPolicemen (policewomen) should treat citizens with courtesy.(警察对人民应该有礼貌)(假如把 policemen 或 policewomen 改为 police officers 就可避免男女性别)3 f; w* I1 J1 n6 R0 k
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Congressmen (congresswomen) should speak up for their constitutes. (国会议员应该为其选民说话)(constitute = voter) (我们也可以把 congressmen 或 congresswomen 改为 members of congress 或 congressional representatives) , ^; F) H# K9 {/ p ) P" [( ~. f0 j% h P3 o0 eStewardesses for international regions may get jet lag sometimes.(国际航线的空中小姐有时会有时差疲惫的现象)(如把 stewardess 改为 flight attendant,就能包括男女空中服务员。) $ E9 r7 p% ?( s. a! k7 s9 ? ' z { l* J2 h5 X6 v) t6 Q7 n同理,我们可以把 salesman 或 saleswoman 改为 salesperson;把 mailman 改为 mail carrier 或 postal worker;把 foreman 改为 supervisor 等等。 " P) M$ m% A$ H1 Q% X/ ?8 l3 ^% r! y6 c
当然,一些带有种族偏见的字眼,甚至有侮辱的味道(insulting words 或 slur),也要尽量避免使用,以免闹出麻烦。例如: ! Q. X! c* o# k* O. u* g% D5 H. I5 R% A2 A6 H0 E
对黑人不要用 Negro,更不能用 Nigger(用 Black 还可以),礼貌的说法是 Afro-American 或 African-American;( T$ a: Q/ e9 U
( |1 r4 l, L- r9 B1 R+ G: Q对白人不要用 Honky(这是黑人骂白人的用字),正确用法是 Caucasian,或 white people;" t9 h2 W! M6 t: F
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对犹太人不要用 Hymies,应该叫 Jewish 或 Jewish people;5 d4 Q1 s9 R5 e6 P' F* e1 Z3 c' ^
6 j. P0 y) s% k$ a, `有偏见的老外,不叫华人为 Chinese,而叫 Chink 或 Chinaman(从前还叫「Yellow Peril」,即黄祸)。遇到这种事,怎么办呢?我建议:「君子不与小人斗」,最好是「不理」(ignore)或「走开」(walk away)。不过老外与你谈话时,如果使用这些不礼貌的字眼,那么你就可以说:「For your information,the word you just used is derogatory(或 inappropriate)to describe someone of my race.」(只想让你知道:你刚刚所用的字,来描写我的族群,是很不合适的)。 % o3 U/ S) S0 ^% ?- [