4 u, |5 M1 L, @& {. K例如:, C1 A$ m4 w0 |. D7 ~" K, k/ b
* U4 X; _6 k# E) O1 d; MMany people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白)( y6 W' l6 [/ {' i/ {6 V4 c+ l4 @
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Three hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。)1 h* H# k) G8 l' i* K' R
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This news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread); G% Z) Z5 M6 J
/ l9 f6 l0 |, o& w1 E# fThe president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?) - d# s0 s- }2 }3 M3 {$ `! t' ^) _& D- I% o1 k
I have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。) , L( y Q1 Q' |) p1 j6 H ]8 I/ t/ [. x6 [! F/ ^
Mr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor)+ l/ l, y3 D y/ q% c7 H& C7 ^
# _0 e# w2 V/ \" D$ L. Y/ ]We hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!) . \" w6 i4 j( V; a* i9 n) g% w( |( N0 P* R, |6 A
The charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词) 9 ^+ ]- X" P$ J% w# X7 |& n# Q; [5 p# M+ K+ k, @0 t& c9 j
We don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。) , `% d8 l* Z) M. K3 ~* j- x4 V5 w1 b Z0 l1 ?& f+ p& s9 E& GPlease act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?) 2 |, B' d7 M4 w$ n2 z5 ~9 O0 a; B9 q) A/ `
这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白!0 d0 j9 \5 z) j* G1 w7 N! r& V
7 F0 F( f5 m/ R1 \! `5 i' o1 b r: X' H! s) d! Z 2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。3 U9 X& w: K3 q+ ~" g4 Y
2 S* A# _/ H- D6 u% t例如: 7 V( Q7 c- w; m Z: s" H2 ]# J& L/ Y7 ?8 Z4 V# P
At this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now)$ O& Z; R4 O) U4 X) ?
" G0 Z7 _, q, C! U. Y" }1 g: Q- V5 ODespite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though) ; W1 l5 C- m9 V7 k6 I0 W- w9 J4 S7 n! O$ ~6 E
I am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think) ' M* {, |# I8 @% S, m% R2 R" V& H v- j) V4 g; a3 k
He quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because) + s$ z& U* C4 w/ X: m ) N& o; \6 q3 D. E' |$ RIn the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually)4 a+ X. n1 ~- n3 @8 T
' V& H/ r0 ?/ V) f" o7 v OShe shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer) 2 B V8 K: Q/ Z- `' d" b+ |, @$ z 9 G5 h! m; I; j- ~* t3 o! A* {# ^: xI will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生)3 w9 ~& Y. n# ^% f3 E, G$ g
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如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如: 4 T }- D# L, s! N * V- X) P# c$ t! S* \The consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。) + R* u1 d# }( p! ]' o0 d. W6 d: F; c% ?; _
The letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.) ; O$ R: x- F' ^) F: G# j y' n/ k7 ^
He has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。)" ^3 D. G8 V7 K$ m3 Z6 |% ~7 e
$ v+ I. y( p1 g" A# G& K" QHe has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味)7 t9 O1 L, C* F3 g; J( H! n
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We assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的) : J) `' F: @/ A2 @1 F. z8 Z 4 _" _, F4 i- R3 H! F- n1 EEnclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收) ! s3 B, D3 N2 p* x, j; L, d7 L/ G# M+ n
写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.) v8 F8 c: {5 i. ?/ V" @( J# }' j$ M' x. s O* b
此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。2 `, ~. W0 U1 s5 x" n
, l6 _3 b3 ~0 [/ r7 U! ^7 `, R. e: C0 K+ R3 b' S* H5 P! \ 3.老外为了族群和谐相处,除不用歧视或偏见的字眼外,连男女性别,也要避免区别,以示「平等」。 ) l2 \( V; h. S6 N 2 b* K0 y8 ]0 }5 @! b R8 Y% V例如: # W0 S' P" l; d- T4 q1 K; b, o& Y8 C" w) K1 O' [7 x
Mankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数) . L/ b% X0 _- f: Q8 r* [0 t9 ?, Q) k& ~
Manpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources)% [: j2 Y6 A+ _
$ r1 n6 s w0 D+ E% w$ G6 ^! IThis small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了) / J. @. o" v* n! z( H O9 x. Z! w( e0 L# D$ t
He (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。)6 m# D6 I! w: E0 I* _/ B# \; [
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Many businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。)5 r I; R" d! g$ h. `. M
4 b" h/ c8 Q3 g- R6 X; x6 m; [Policemen (policewomen) should treat citizens with courtesy.(警察对人民应该有礼貌)(假如把 policemen 或 policewomen 改为 police officers 就可避免男女性别) 0 u! E8 f& h7 p7 g3 ~% o " ~' z" y' J) n& u/ B9 xCongressmen (congresswomen) should speak up for their constitutes. (国会议员应该为其选民说话)(constitute = voter) (我们也可以把 congressmen 或 congresswomen 改为 members of congress 或 congressional representatives)- e* Z* W; a- O* v3 O1 O) v6 ~0 |
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Stewardesses for international regions may get jet lag sometimes.(国际航线的空中小姐有时会有时差疲惫的现象)(如把 stewardess 改为 flight attendant,就能包括男女空中服务员。); h0 ~7 d' o& b$ F/ H u( t
. a! G, t! j; s$ w& W同理,我们可以把 salesman 或 saleswoman 改为 salesperson;把 mailman 改为 mail carrier 或 postal worker;把 foreman 改为 supervisor 等等。: o" E' N! Z# D w6 K3 o. `