5 w- j; @. X3 M; k例如: - c' M) q; t4 c& x3 A, ?/ H+ m9 m5 p % o! p, M7 E0 I# R6 J M6 E+ KMany people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白) 3 ` V/ r7 G6 A9 w3 f- f% B' I' _' r3 Z- T6 W+ Y
Three hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。)1 e% H. N% z M, A1 J
$ H. R, O: I5 Z: BThis news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread) 1 Z. |. [- x: t6 T# x7 D; t* x* H& ?* O7 z0 w7 i% Q0 P9 q
The president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?) 4 |5 G+ G! W% ]( O 0 }+ ^0 o1 t2 [5 a" LI have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。) : E9 Y' a9 c ~9 ~9 N * w0 \& G) M, d& jMr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor)# T7 x/ f9 i/ v
, V9 l$ z& \1 v" T$ \: X( x2 L
We hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!) ; y+ l9 W( p% j: u8 _' _* c6 S, x: k$ v) ]0 W9 k
The charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词)/ d; u! R9 _ y# J
8 S+ G# S3 ]' t* C1 R( z
We don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。), Q, w2 n$ |2 h0 ]
( c) I% S. e6 }2 ^' v5 |2 b Y
Please act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?) : m3 a( |6 x) B6 r' N* V7 i# l ; v: f# d3 X5 ^这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白!/ [$ D; x# |$ y6 ?
. n6 a* f. ?8 P" ]$ C : @9 p# T$ v( `% d2 S( N9 S2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。* d+ e1 L9 o3 m6 Z
! w( O$ U j: g, F; B
例如:& z$ g# H" d7 f( o5 ]3 c; E
6 v# a" F% ]( d5 {: a
At this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now) % [( S: g$ z! ^5 G2 V* w4 Z: E- e O& [& X/ w. e
Despite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though) * P/ D/ F H4 M, l ( W* R3 V4 ~5 l+ o6 U9 YI am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think)0 J+ b5 b3 M: L0 L3 h* }+ A
) m+ \, ~% }$ |; i" t
He quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because)) p- U% s; x, Z- \6 x* O, _/ O
6 m( L3 m; e/ [6 sIn the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually)5 m7 r/ W& C; B: @/ b/ E
( c( n/ v) v! dShe shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer)) h3 W2 c: x: y1 K1 O" i! F
; |, G1 P8 h8 l
I will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生) ; q& X9 d9 F) D7 P; |+ @6 K ) r8 O4 [3 A+ v% ?. K* D. X" ~+ c7 N如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如:; n* }. x6 X: N, a: _
2 |9 ^$ Z0 }! r+ \
The consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。) - |' e, n3 f; R8 S! h+ Z- H% Q0 w
The letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.); S" T$ R2 E6 _& O4 p0 V8 k
7 e3 Q. v& y A2 s1 H& v
He has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。) 5 }8 W$ }* l/ s: y9 C 0 G" x# Y3 }! V% ZHe has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味) $ v1 e% O0 t. s& | 1 P% A8 A I2 a# B; LWe assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的) ' O( r1 h& i( k" I; o p1 O, ]1 g4 m( ?1 [4 ^! G9 N9 P: S
Enclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收); H& \" S/ k2 U( c6 ]
* q9 m* ]% F( ^: [. N( Q/ W
写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.)0 b' [# ?: @4 v% \9 g# }3 F& N* A+ C
1 Y& I4 a6 ?6 @% Z( y+ [/ d此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。 + q; Z) [4 B- _6 G' @7 a& R: K' K" H5 Z+ }/ Z
7 m T# |- h5 g8 \/ c 3.老外为了族群和谐相处,除不用歧视或偏见的字眼外,连男女性别,也要避免区别,以示「平等」。 1 y3 j$ N& G; K. B 8 _9 G' `) n( a- V例如: ( o/ [+ {8 B0 y6 a/ O' T 7 W8 `5 Y1 q% V" mMankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数). [ F$ E* h W# ^& M
& T6 z5 k! n$ XManpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources) 9 O. \% h- G! l v3 C4 I, j: |/ o% ^, {* T0 g9 ~$ n: c; Y
This small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了)8 v4 }' i4 I( {) J+ C
, W& D0 Q/ j% y# FHe (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。) 6 \, t, G. }. y" a* \/ O& v" s( B8 T$ @$ T5 `! T
Many businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。)5 |% _& l; m% b# ]5 y7 a
: l% j! b" \# ~8 S: A9 l: z7 W
Policemen (policewomen) should treat citizens with courtesy.(警察对人民应该有礼貌)(假如把 policemen 或 policewomen 改为 police officers 就可避免男女性别) 8 \" p8 D2 {8 F) y9 A& _! c1 L 4 K( U8 k2 j- M. ^: p7 HCongressmen (congresswomen) should speak up for their constitutes. (国会议员应该为其选民说话)(constitute = voter) (我们也可以把 congressmen 或 congresswomen 改为 members of congress 或 congressional representatives) % J( I- ?) F* l" n& b. j+ |4 O d1 x) B! z
Stewardesses for international regions may get jet lag sometimes.(国际航线的空中小姐有时会有时差疲惫的现象)(如把 stewardess 改为 flight attendant,就能包括男女空中服务员。)0 k& a, r( J; J& Z* f/ ?" I2 S
2 c- a' H k- D( J0 g2 Q3 S同理,我们可以把 salesman 或 saleswoman 改为 salesperson;把 mailman 改为 mail carrier 或 postal worker;把 foreman 改为 supervisor 等等。& e N, N [! f0 Q F
) y: F% u2 J+ Z8 p$ }" A6 Q
当然,一些带有种族偏见的字眼,甚至有侮辱的味道(insulting words 或 slur),也要尽量避免使用,以免闹出麻烦。例如:3 ~+ J2 J K @, j8 N
# A( {+ \* p! J, Q `- a
对黑人不要用 Negro,更不能用 Nigger(用 Black 还可以),礼貌的说法是 Afro-American 或 African-American;! q. N7 `; H1 ?5 n
: Z- d7 S' \* ]4 q) @对白人不要用 Honky(这是黑人骂白人的用字),正确用法是 Caucasian,或 white people;2 X( X5 c- ]% \. q