& i; ?( P: ~& AMany people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白)1 N6 T" s w6 L. `: j
6 x# o% b; T1 l' n/ ]6 H0 @. D2 J" `Three hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。) 9 f% V# P0 |& g 3 Q( C# I) N: C* }This news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread) ! v3 X, C9 x+ y$ F4 |. [: [4 L- W' L* C0 `
The president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?)* z" m1 d0 R* r# G; \
4 v7 f; [5 T$ g1 A a) @& II have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。)- Z: p- G4 `7 l o K6 M! v5 r
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Mr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor)' n3 @& c- V9 F2 ]+ S
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We hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!)2 Y/ q0 e% d8 g9 S. B$ m
9 G8 i' S, b' |6 i7 F* V4 @" W) gThe charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词) 6 d r, I2 Z0 o+ B' s4 r3 h+ ~7 h6 J. S3 {& h R( c
We don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。)9 `2 O& Q% U; g! E8 X% ~: X6 H
+ \7 W$ x1 F* d5 bPlease act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?) K1 L& K) {$ M. ~( b! o
, q* ^ ?: Z/ l这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白!/ q3 _6 D. f% U& e/ z0 H
! }9 ~ u" w# U1 S! i8 H9 T3 d- {& C7 j3 b 2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。 " n3 q9 E! u3 M6 n- k6 K, V' r* {) }- O$ {% @9 L
例如: 8 l4 u9 f$ s+ r9 I, _2 t M, X) S4 I4 S- p: |' r0 G9 P9 i# k m9 D
At this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now) 8 t8 e4 i( ^) H% P ; K0 C2 E% w' ZDespite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though)+ t! N8 l: c# w& r
7 H( Q4 T) ^2 K) u# b& ?, m. lI am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think), O- J2 J# c" d: B) t0 }% K& y
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He quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because)6 N- L) J5 }3 A' x% R" m, x
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In the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually) 1 w2 @8 f% x* r. I J. D: b8 B/ H% e5 G% H9 I! W3 R
She shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer)- Q& M9 _/ }4 ~3 j. F3 t2 Q8 J! ^
5 a6 z4 R7 z6 l% R1 x: _I will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生)& S! h- S' K0 c3 i, E4 b( s
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如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如:6 s- Y+ P, P( w" p( Y' f6 Z& d
, I& B" m. _) qThe consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。) 1 s1 g- G0 g4 V, |# k, K. B& B ! ` M4 ~, [- `' wThe letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.)' Q0 `3 o% ^7 w4 F
. U! r2 D. {$ y vHe has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。) y9 I9 s/ r4 g- B2 S
* K) M; `& b# h( v& QHe has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味) 4 F4 t* J, m$ F8 Z1 N# m* ]; q7 G$ X& k4 T0 j/ w, B" t
We assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的). l6 x, g% J6 \. r# Z
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Enclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收). b9 o* b: Q* `% ^9 g
. ?, ]/ u2 N4 q. k1 B写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.)2 M ]; `, E$ a+ ?- i
! z. ?9 b5 ~ b M. |此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。 : n7 C6 u; X0 {; ^ $ M9 B$ g7 H4 t- A: `2 O" z6 \* E9 G1 c5 ~ 3.老外为了族群和谐相处,除不用歧视或偏见的字眼外,连男女性别,也要避免区别,以示「平等」。 F; c8 W: B! s) Z' e
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例如:1 Z- `7 R5 s* m5 a% U2 n M
& q k* t5 k: d$ E1 M ~2 v1 LMankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数)& ?( B' t4 _# T9 t' F
- ~/ p9 d9 V+ k- d7 QManpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources) " [+ h% {8 ^1 o. V- @5 P8 G1 P! Z) f* H
This small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了) 4 g5 ]: ?- @. F6 z; L0 c; e; G. Q8 x! q6 N
He (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。) $ l' ^. N5 g( y1 b0 M + t) u1 b. C8 t+ @3 rMany businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。)+ ?! y9 b% A( C- b' R7 H