4 X& g2 k5 U R4 l1 gMany people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白)/ @6 z% s0 y9 u5 }! A
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Three hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。) # \8 L4 |) |7 V# u5 Z! S0 K8 o4 j( V+ p& E0 }- [7 `
This news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread) / u, {& w) R2 Z0 x% h( Q3 x8 M) {: G1 U7 u
The president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?)9 y- A: j/ _. A& e' s( x: l
) W* v, o' e+ V, Y8 s" u6 D4 ]* tI have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。) 0 T9 R3 i& r4 X$ s# S: u! Q" X) M* k) F3 v
Mr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor). N% b/ w' {9 b
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We hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!)- e3 M$ H& k1 n
3 {; x/ A) b- _, ]The charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词) 2 X. B/ l7 z1 l$ R; a3 ]) r! O / D: L1 j* z" @! LWe don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。) ' K. L6 X& I& ]3 [4 Q% r/ ~1 G$ l+ t3 {' h8 F
Please act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?)' u" Q. r6 G# M9 V) s
0 j5 Y$ h& J% _5 _这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白!. o4 M6 U! y+ ]' c: _# }
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- ~" y% i- ?4 U% ?' A) O2 Y: b" m5 Q2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。 - ]5 ]) l2 f/ Z: { . r3 \% a7 L% s& ?# w例如:( L' {7 x' p* Q8 F& y: f# A* Q
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At this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now) ; v- w+ c/ e& ~9 o* a! x: i- g6 c/ a8 x* t$ h
Despite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though)' {$ r) S" x. J6 c5 k$ V
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I am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think)" m+ M: S+ [6 U6 V( g
. D2 }* n+ z5 dHe quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because) & ]" P% O+ n. |% b2 _0 {/ z M; o+ I+ N8 t
In the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually)6 K2 i4 ^/ U* {9 u3 i
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She shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer) ( `. w2 ^; X1 s0 A- u 9 ]& g7 g6 b# l: E* Y) rI will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生); V0 C* S. a3 K/ `* h* n& ^/ T
# X; p2 q9 h# ?2 Q* ^: d如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如:) V& V3 [6 T& U) T( d
1 A8 H% R7 M: }4 GThe consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。) 9 y" o, b! I# D) K( q ' `7 l: [7 ~ i8 U4 x) _1 e* aThe letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.) 1 r( J; D$ W {( N1 M5 i. z! A+ Y8 |2 `- L/ I4 C m% E0 T! T. o
He has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。) 7 P6 s/ |9 r/ _( { 0 |" Z: I. s( v$ S' l1 k0 pHe has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味)# }% Y& |+ M% I, Y5 e& j- C/ y2 O
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We assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的) ; m3 ~1 Z$ P8 r( w ! c# q$ j X E$ `$ d' L0 CEnclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收): Q9 n" E% @* a
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写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.) ) d+ |! z* F9 i+ }; c9 i2 U7 e8 ?2 L3 c4 Q- g/ m" y* w- J) K9 C
此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。 9 l2 ?8 M( K+ ]; ~) o2 h9 H- q2 g6 W- |" c& M
4 W: k5 _ n# |0 e1 B. h# E3 n 3.老外为了族群和谐相处,除不用歧视或偏见的字眼外,连男女性别,也要避免区别,以示「平等」。 - e* ]0 I! j- y# N+ S$ ~ w- l! t
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; a: s! i% w! P0 iMankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数)$ A) y8 x+ C; F
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Manpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources) ' I" z/ d4 w: i- z ) o9 N/ u( [1 u! @7 |1 c# eThis small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了)( u5 K3 T2 i' Q' u) D3 q) K# M# f$ B' }
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He (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。)# ^1 @" ]3 I: N( Y! z) f
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Many businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。) ( }; P& f- V4 I$ V. c! A; W* U- h* k& e/ c' m F
Policemen (policewomen) should treat citizens with courtesy.(警察对人民应该有礼貌)(假如把 policemen 或 policewomen 改为 police officers 就可避免男女性别)) w {' T' }' J0 ^$ _4 C9 X1 S
: H: N ]' A& D2 h0 f* m2 Q) J0 RCongressmen (congresswomen) should speak up for their constitutes. (国会议员应该为其选民说话)(constitute = voter) (我们也可以把 congressmen 或 congresswomen 改为 members of congress 或 congressional representatives) # [9 m" j8 k, A( V; e2 x5 P# N: L1 |% ^! ^, ^) r+ g% Q1 p
Stewardesses for international regions may get jet lag sometimes.(国际航线的空中小姐有时会有时差疲惫的现象)(如把 stewardess 改为 flight attendant,就能包括男女空中服务员。)3 q6 m" V2 {4 Q8 H, C
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同理,我们可以把 salesman 或 saleswoman 改为 salesperson;把 mailman 改为 mail carrier 或 postal worker;把 foreman 改为 supervisor 等等。6 I5 j3 m7 [3 D1 b- H8 s0 @
# P5 ]4 e2 t* n, s! O4 u, K, g2 _当然,一些带有种族偏见的字眼,甚至有侮辱的味道(insulting words 或 slur),也要尽量避免使用,以免闹出麻烦。例如:& F8 _5 N' S: v$ L