% a, `; y& o7 M( v% b4 z' N( E例如: / i6 y& i W9 T6 j3 N- q& b ' j, t5 l3 P M9 vMany people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白) ' L% v8 E* @' a, x7 ]: f! w! C& z" k" V4 r0 ]+ e7 {1 F# w6 V
Three hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。) 5 f% o" q" R& s' @. S / k; g. W- ]; n. IThis news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread) 7 a5 x9 T/ L8 n0 j+ M4 s4 O* _# m, }# i! w" a* w% I& l( L' j
The president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?) - |- w& m' V) g/ m+ d- B# x " l; R L8 Z3 ?I have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。) # {% F. L8 H0 g* x# t& d* I : p9 K" @2 d ~2 J0 J' }' XMr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor) " ?: S4 x7 V/ `" ~. q3 F/ x ' `" B5 u6 n7 h' sWe hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!) q3 h, @9 a1 _( ]; Q& i 8 j3 Z# X! ]- Q {9 NThe charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词)6 P3 h! P. I! S/ x; Q7 ^
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We don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。)4 N- }, t2 v( k$ s0 y* r( _3 j# `
" |/ y. s- C+ A1 i0 tPlease act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?)2 Q; c& f9 H9 a9 j$ [( J
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这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白!% s/ y: ~& [9 Y# ]7 ?
: U& j' J& s' T9 M# D: o8 r % b) D G4 n6 n# r2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。 8 U: }5 V0 U- @' }8 C; x* W. n3 Z! ?3 Y! p5 a
例如:( ]/ ~5 C' b, c+ V. R0 Q/ G
) h% ?& s8 N" I3 d' V! d* j% rAt this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now) . Q7 s2 L* L% u# Y e0 g : O6 ?. ^! L# S& I/ ]3 hDespite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though) , F6 @ O1 F6 W8 y % V: W8 C- I" y9 A7 }8 O WI am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think)) u- v8 K; p. u4 r4 g( ]
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He quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because)% J3 \" Q) ~, o+ @% V3 v
5 S% g' d' P: j2 `In the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually) ' r, m) Z. f6 B+ q6 D: e + Q+ W0 Y- q: q GShe shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer)2 r& E, [5 `, p( u$ E" j% i
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I will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生)7 Y0 m& b7 w% B( r! L
6 }1 Y) d; O6 Q; \; ^如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如: + [0 ~5 B1 ~7 X" w; U7 a: w2 F( C# s+ h$ M. L1 L0 f3 V9 v4 ?
The consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。) & Z; Q/ W! v3 r. G) p0 ?, n3 k' y! I 6 k& E" r9 r, K/ }5 \The letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.) % A+ X0 ~ s( ^: ]6 w# W% `3 t' }* J# E4 n' N* ]. ^: |
He has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。) # c" {8 y9 S! Z' y. o) J7 @ 3 g( h$ ]4 l3 IHe has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味); L+ O3 x, d- s( D
) ~, B: }; B' f' tWe assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的) 6 z" W. b8 i9 T6 X6 G( s) p7 N/ e2 Z' _+ s/ Z) U, L
Enclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收)5 o4 I2 ~* e( |
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写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.)/ r( O. z: h3 A" L" G9 O6 L
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此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。" X3 o; W: h! L) H1 Y
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# R8 v1 U& m4 D6 f+ n3.老外为了族群和谐相处,除不用歧视或偏见的字眼外,连男女性别,也要避免区别,以示「平等」。 3 \1 |* ~! _& G7 _5 s4 z2 a$ {7 \" C8 l, W- ^9 a+ g4 B$ G% j, E4 Y
例如: 7 ^6 I! K! }- ]) S4 B, v& k& j, i5 @( f) z( j* R7 U
Mankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数). j+ @, R! _$ i2 g4 u1 ~
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Manpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources)3 g4 O8 s$ I! \4 X6 x3 {
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This small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了) u2 Q$ ?# j' I , C) }: `) L* RHe (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。) / A& P/ d, Q6 `& r! v/ T! N2 K* u, |1 G: @! t* x
Many businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。) + @" T6 ^7 k" l- B0 G& j+ T$ a1 ^* b2 K0 J3 A9 \/ x
Policemen (policewomen) should treat citizens with courtesy.(警察对人民应该有礼貌)(假如把 policemen 或 policewomen 改为 police officers 就可避免男女性别)* q& X% G3 O6 M# w% O- E) S
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Congressmen (congresswomen) should speak up for their constitutes. (国会议员应该为其选民说话)(constitute = voter) (我们也可以把 congressmen 或 congresswomen 改为 members of congress 或 congressional representatives)/ q# f8 l7 q' U8 t
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Stewardesses for international regions may get jet lag sometimes.(国际航线的空中小姐有时会有时差疲惫的现象)(如把 stewardess 改为 flight attendant,就能包括男女空中服务员。)+ D3 I, r/ y9 v6 q. a: ~
* w h6 I: _. Q! J. H同理,我们可以把 salesman 或 saleswoman 改为 salesperson;把 mailman 改为 mail carrier 或 postal worker;把 foreman 改为 supervisor 等等。6 f0 V! E; t% g' W; v
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当然,一些带有种族偏见的字眼,甚至有侮辱的味道(insulting words 或 slur),也要尽量避免使用,以免闹出麻烦。例如:" N$ o! A0 i) [) m
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对黑人不要用 Negro,更不能用 Nigger(用 Black 还可以),礼貌的说法是 Afro-American 或 African-American; - I. Q. J8 m1 V. C$ `7 H* h& C" r$ O" w$ G& `6 a4 d: `( I d
对白人不要用 Honky(这是黑人骂白人的用字),正确用法是 Caucasian,或 white people;, Q2 F% w Q* K3 c