. X* j" y- h3 \2 R例如: 6 Z5 U; \ r3 S6 x7 {: t2 b( _3 T 8 N0 [2 H% f5 ^+ fMany people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白)+ o% ^" g t& d1 c5 N6 N+ C
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Three hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。) 1 G5 Q9 W6 N$ h4 X9 a7 Y4 _& G' F% [
This news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread). Y! @; b; g1 J9 B$ B; @0 ~$ v
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The president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?): L8 d* K/ }: I% w
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I have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。) - n- U8 A2 ~* r& W9 a% `; b: C8 {; _$ }, e
Mr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor)7 A. P% ~% F+ c G7 S; T6 ?
# \ r+ K. h T6 ]We hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!) , v$ d' @1 e, M+ f5 }0 ]4 ]. H" Z 8 w4 U$ e# f1 f; A. f" c% d, xThe charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词) * R$ u$ K# N: J& _5 c6 z: h 1 R' T8 n! [6 [; v% p; q6 iWe don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。) * a [6 k% H8 k: b1 Y7 P0 S " w, q; R; c5 ~2 q! N, X) \% v* ? oPlease act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?) - y+ r4 @5 ]. E4 H, Z % o1 {+ o2 ]8 k这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白! $ X8 h, {! u& K( B$ g. W% F ' @; u& c4 C8 m, B: c2 N) F; E/ |* E# k7 F- i, n 2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。 / _6 c/ T3 n: e) {( h# S, q, w; S$ I( d, M% s$ @1 i7 o% J
例如:" N2 c8 |1 _0 G$ K% t5 k" i5 w9 N
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At this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now), k, W$ |" {. h5 o' W, Q/ x0 @
( j4 o+ ], M$ D( ^+ b- u+ a% H [9 `Despite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though) 2 s' Q9 u& N Y$ C 3 ?8 O5 W7 [0 ?I am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think) 3 i; s2 g% E6 X: \& C0 T l4 @ N2 Z3 j- B% d
He quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because)7 h' m1 r8 n9 l
1 j" a0 O# D s3 L" N4 c, QIn the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually). ~7 F- I5 X) I! o& P% e
1 l. b( h- C5 _' @& R# ?She shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer): d: P/ y7 e/ J9 S; ]0 K
# B+ [/ ^. j: M/ zI will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生) 3 y3 O$ d* r3 t p; S1 b ' e# U$ O$ r4 U, l% f如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如: & p5 l3 S2 q+ [3 p- o O1 f 3 ~$ V2 b1 I7 c' TThe consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。)# H, I4 }7 [4 g2 M4 K
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The letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.) ! w3 c- _2 |/ ?- R5 Q 5 ~3 p9 `. S" r' _( Q rHe has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。)1 R9 {7 H% _1 T7 a- d9 F. s k5 F
9 O4 M4 H" y3 L4 U3 p) dHe has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味) * l- t) U# j; ^9 j1 j, g. y . e7 R) R, g0 U$ h7 lWe assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的) ! v5 U9 d y* ^. C; X& a/ f7 }+ L$ r# ?. s- z$ s7 }7 u/ d' S, t* ?+ f
Enclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收) ' s& K* i" L2 S- f + _- c2 r2 H# {0 c* I# ^写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.) 8 S4 }* F# V, z9 ^6 I% B, p; s' v, {& W8 l3 r: ^
此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。 " k a& n! W C2 Z# Q 6 E! \' \& t% ^7 \2 O" u: ?. q" O( j' m 3.老外为了族群和谐相处,除不用歧视或偏见的字眼外,连男女性别,也要避免区别,以示「平等」。1 K3 y& J3 u3 Y7 w
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例如: $ z2 |- t0 _& s # a' E1 ^* N, b% f6 HMankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数)2 E3 q. j) c; |8 A) D) h0 l3 @
, c; _4 O0 J4 d UManpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources)2 a3 k. B7 p# c; Q# x
$ {( |) H% a0 W+ I$ LThis small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了) . G" V8 q6 `; L& }, N% q: N & N1 y5 e V% z. \# DHe (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。) . t& ^5 s( d5 A+ z7 L) v- k; X- h$ T% z* ^! i7 r
Many businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。) 0 g/ b) {) Z1 j( k $ f4 _, u$ N' V- t2 f* oPolicemen (policewomen) should treat citizens with courtesy.(警察对人民应该有礼貌)(假如把 policemen 或 policewomen 改为 police officers 就可避免男女性别) 1 L- e% b' P3 j $ x+ `1 Z9 S$ }% {, {Congressmen (congresswomen) should speak up for their constitutes. (国会议员应该为其选民说话)(constitute = voter) (我们也可以把 congressmen 或 congresswomen 改为 members of congress 或 congressional representatives) - k6 X8 q) w9 c1 }% N 8 Z" o0 M! f a, L: `$ L ?Stewardesses for international regions may get jet lag sometimes.(国际航线的空中小姐有时会有时差疲惫的现象)(如把 stewardess 改为 flight attendant,就能包括男女空中服务员。) 9 g# _# H# a) A5 {% k4 X; a8 U/ J! t+ i; d# }/ {
同理,我们可以把 salesman 或 saleswoman 改为 salesperson;把 mailman 改为 mail carrier 或 postal worker;把 foreman 改为 supervisor 等等。 4 o: E z1 Y! A* t( |6 X! @ c2 I$ z& E( p4 T7 {! E
当然,一些带有种族偏见的字眼,甚至有侮辱的味道(insulting words 或 slur),也要尽量避免使用,以免闹出麻烦。例如:8 W& ^. C- E4 v: U! ^. Y9 M
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对黑人不要用 Negro,更不能用 Nigger(用 Black 还可以),礼貌的说法是 Afro-American 或 African-American;+ V2 i- b2 A0 Y0 `" J